Fill in the Blank First Friday

First Friday of the New Year. How's it going for you? How's your New Year starting out? Mine, pretty well other than the fact my to-do list is massive and I've had two days of all day meetings. I'm not letting it get to me. Taking it as it comes and non-striving. I was listening to my new Mindfulness CD from Jon Kabat-Zinn and he emphasizes that there is always such a need in our American society to Do Do Do Do, get stuff done, always be productive. It is just the American way, the American work ethic. We tend to always want to strive for more, for a better career, a better home, better things, better relationships. We don't just "be" and enjoy what we have in the moment, in front of us at this time. After all, we are human "beings" right?

 

Over the past couple of years, having Didi around, I would always strive to get things done. Make my lists like the one above, coordinate when I could do them, make plans to do it in a certain order and every time I did that nothing got done. Everything would never go as planned, it was always awry. I was feeling inadequate and not celebrating the little things I was actually accomplishing like raising my daughter, feeding her, bathing her, playing with her. Dan and I were cultivating the beginnings of our family, the traditions we will hold, and the base of love that is so vitally important. I've enjoyed and learned from every step of the way, however I was still feeling incapable since I wasn't super mom.

 

I started to observe that when I just let things flow naturally with no striving, it all fell into place as it should. Maybe the floors didn't get swept, but we enjoyed a much needed bike ride instead. Maybe I ended up doing all the dishes, prepping a dinner for the next day and folding laundry even though I didn't "plan" or strive to get it done that night. It made me seriously think about the pressures I am putting on myself, causing stress and the unreachable expectations for me, my family, and my friends at times. It's not that it has been that bad, I just feel more connected to the source of the universe and understand these past two years have been such a wonderful learning experience for me. Coordinating so many things at once is exactly what I wanted, but I am acquiring a completely different mindset in my approach.

 

Remember when I was writing about making lists of chores and coordinating them with Dan? We tried that in December, didn't work. Again, it was the striving to plan and coordinate. What works better is for us to keep a list of things we would like to accomplish and mark them off as we go along. Being mindful of the moment, the day. Yes, we still make plans for things, it's not like we are all free willy nilly, but the pressure is off. The practice of being in the moment is on.

 

Swimming in this Sea of Life,

La Sirena

 

 

Feel free to play along!

 

1.   One of my favorite things to do when I have free time is   read, blog, be outside, nap or watch a movie.

2.   When I have free time I tend to   really enjoy it instead of freaking out that something needs to get done.

3.  If I had an entire day completely to myself I would   get up late at 8 (i know, sad right?), walk to downtown and have breakfast at Luciles, walk home, read then nap, then shower, then got for a snowshoe adventure and find a beautiful view to sit and breathe. Then come home and make dinner, then watch a movie.

4.  I would prefer to spend my free time (alone or with others...)    Both really, I like my me time, but I also like to spend time with friends and family .

5.  Most of my free time happens    never. Ok, just kidding, probably during naps or lunch hours when working, time at night too.

6.  The best thing about free time is   the beautiful emptiness is holds.

7.  The next time I have free time I should probably    put away the Christmas decorations   but instead, I'll probably     have a cocktail and watch Sons of Anarchy.